Count Your Blessings

  This morning I remembered a hymn we used to sing in school. Our teacher would first sing and then we all followed suit dutifully, repeating each line after her. I had no idea why she taught us this song, or any other song for that matter. But I did enjoy the singing lessons. Once we learned the song, we sang it many more times in the school assembly during morning prayers.We used to know the words by heart. But never even once did I stop to think about the words and what they meant. Reason could be that I was too small then, perhaps in the 3rd or 4th grade. For some reason I started humming the song this morning. I hardly remembered the lines, but the two that I had not forgotten were:
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
Count your blessings, see what God has done!
  I suddenly wanted to recall all the lines and remember how the whole song sounded. And thanks to You-tube I found it and listened to it after many years.
Click the link below if you would like to listen...
Count Your Blessings
  Now as an adult I know why my teacher taught me that song. And I believe its enough to remember just those two lines. And yes I have learned to count my blessings, and there are many of them.

The Monsoon Memoirs

I remember the anticipation of the monsoon

My small world waiting for the rains

The respite it brought to the dusty roads

And sweltering summer heat

The welcome sheets of gray shielding the sun

I remember the downpours during the summer holidays

Making paper boats for the gutters

Leaning out the window feeling the spray on my face

My mother calling out to me 

Handing me a bowl of hot spicy peanuts

I remember how the sea looked in the rain

Giant waves taunting the skies

The wild wind sweeping the rain

I still have not forgotten

How the rain and sea became one 

I  remember the walks in the rain

A tree under which I stood

The emerald rain drops dripping from the leaves

The sparkling eyes of a boy I loved
Who walked with me twice in the rain

An Afternoon Siesta

Ever since I earned my PhD I hardly held a job with fixed hours. The only times I ever stuck to a schedule post PhD was during my volunteering stint that lasted a few months at an elder services.  Many a time I have asked myself the same question over and over again.  Am I slipping into nothingness? After much deliberation the answer is always the same: no not really or some variation of it. There is a long list of things I have discovered, none of those would have been possible if I was working my ass off...

• I realized the fun in making little things using my hands, ranging all the way from making jewelry to playing around with dried flowers, i.e handicrafts; reliving the elementary school SUPW and needle-work horrors I certainly am not. This is way more fun!
• Flowers, tomatoes and green chilies became a new obsession. Loved being around plants. Cant wait for this season..
• Long chats with my friends and family, online or on phone: just plain gossiping to deep soul-searching. Realizing what a great blessing it is to be surrounded by my loved ones. I now have the time to recognize the lengths they got to, for make my life happier and easier. I have missed out on acknowledging the little gestures for too long. Love you guys for doing that!
• Enjoying a nice book without feeling guilty I could have used the time for something more productive.
• Rediscovered my veena and got lucky in finding one again. However, the search for a real teacher continues, unless you count instructional DVD lessons as one.
• My friendship with the skillet continues to progress unhindered, and I have added a few more feathers to my culinary cap
• And well, shopping is perennially fun, busy or not.
• I listen to music as much as I want, with all the time in the world to listen to enchanting voices swooning in love, pining in sorrow or blubbering plain rubbish. And can listen to the same tracks again and again and again.
• The time gave me a chance to ponder on stuff that has always taken a backseat. And I am beginning to understand some difficult friendships are just meant to be that: difficult. And sometimes it is just better to let go of some people and things than to keep on struggling to hold on to them. Am I sounding all grown-up now? Whoa! Scary!
• An occasional afternoon siesta and  a cup of creamy, spicy sweet tea in the evening is pleasure unparalleled.
• I now have time to gaze at the rain, hear the birds chirping, and watch the green shimmer of grass in the afternoon sunlight.
• My only woe is that I miss being in the lab and well if you count making money is important then I haven't done that too, in quite a while. But since this is my list, it shows up at the bottom.

With all the time in the world I sometimes am surprised at how little of it I have left. And admire how my friends with real jobs and/or babies handle it all. Like so many of you I too have never taken a real break until now. Sometimes I fear that this is too good to be true and get paranoid that something is not right. But I do love this state of doing nothing but enjoying everything I do. I have to admit unabashedly, minus the tiny occasional pangs of longing to go back to work, I truly am enjoying the beauty this vacuum is giving my life. And yes I now have time to stop and smell the flowers, true to the word. Fabulous!

Yet Again

Searching for the silence that surrounds me in the sea of voices

The calmness that engulfed me amidst the thousand cacophonous happenings of the world

Reminiscing the tranquility and serenity of the salty ocean breeze, I search for it now

Hither and thither, now and forever, searching, hoping and praying  to find it yet again

Existing in a place where my mind is at peace, one with the universe, one with myself, one with you

Defeating the stresses of everyday existence and savoring the victories of togetherness

Reliving the calmness and simplicity of a single rainy day,  I yearn for it now

Above and below, yesterday and tomorrow, exploring, aspiring and imploring to find it yet again

Tranquility for eternity, impossible but ever achievable, so near yet so far

Lost in my words, I reach the perfect place, the memories of the ocean, the rain, the thunder and the lightning

The warm embrace surrounding me on lonely nights, the calm that takes over my body, I cherish it now

Here and now, washing away in these reflections, grateful for my life, I feel the harmony and revel in it yet again.

The Procrastinators Paradise

Ohh...How sweet are the fruits of procrastination. Only until they reach a point of rotting. I for one am the greatest procrastinator ever know to me :) There is an infinite list of things I had been intending to do.

To name a few:
Finish reading Salman Rushdie's Shalimar The Clown
Read Tagore's Gitanjali for a second time
Tune my Veena to start playing it again
Organize my clothes and shoes
Give my favorite friend a ring
Dust the inside of my car
Try out the various craft project kits I collected from each trip to the book store
And of course...make a plan for exercising and STICKING to it...and the list goes on..

I am sure there are a lot of us like that..and as some wise woman(ok ok..or man) so aptly said..Procrastinators unite tomorrow!!

I wanted to be a blogger from time immemorial. But have been putting it off, thinking I will start this month, this week, tomorrow..And I have been leaving a note to myself : Tomorrow I will start blogging

Today I finally found a way to outsmart my own delaying tactics...

So, signing off....A motivated procrastinator ;)